Thursday, July 25, 2013

The Thing about Hugs!


I woke up this morning with a thought on my mind: ‘’ I NEED A HUG! I just need someone to hold me tight and whisper in my ears that everything is going to be alright’’. I’m not sure if I’m needy, or maybe I feel  vulnerable or it’s just my heart that’s yearning for that warm gesture.

Such a thought sounds odd, doesn’t it? Well, I’m just being honest with myself. I’m human and I have needs; Physical, financial, spiritual or emotional...the list is endless. We all have needs so wanting a hug shouldn’t sound out of place. To be honest, if I decide to share this need of mine via the social media, I’m sure I will get a bunch of virtual hugs in form of smileys and comments but No! That’s not what I need right now! There’s nothing real about that at all! Allow me explain what I mean exactly.

Well, a hug is a show of affection and love. I can tell you for a fact there are some hugs that are so full of warmth you don’t want it to end if you know what I mean. A hug can last for a minimum of three seconds or five minutes or even longer depending on the state of mind and the relationship between the parties involved, if you know what I mean! I’m sure you’ve heard of types of hugs too. The Full hug which is also known as the 360 degrees, hmm, guys love that a lot oh, don’t ask me why!*winks* There’s also the 180 degrees which is also known as the side hug. For a long time I was very generous with the side hug to avoid getting into trouble or being mis-interpreted, better still for obvious ‘physical’ reasons*winks*. Side-hugs are Ok, formal and nice. Just for the record, I don’t do full hugs except you are really ‘special’, to show you, ‘you are loved’, that ‘I care,’ ‘you mean a lot to me’ or ‘I have missed you so much’. Hugs can also be used to convey different messages to your loved ones; it’s a form of emotional attachment. A hug can go a long way to make your day. It can soothe your frayed nerves and calm you in seemingly difficult situations. That is why I so much agree with Minhal Mehdi who said that “Hugs should be available at the medical stores 24/7. Sometimes, they are the best healers for almost everything.”

I recall a funny experience in my former office, there was this guy who literally lives on hugs, really funny dude. A colleague told me that he would go round the office collecting hugs from other colleagues, I thought she was kidding. I was sitting in the office and working on some stuff and here comes the dude after exchanged pleasantries and guess what? He demanded for his hug like a birthright! Huh?!

With arms spread wide open in a ‘come-to-daddy’ style, he said: ‘‘Come and give me a hug’’ I was a little dumbfounded but I obliged him anyways. As usual, I wanted to do my three- seconds formal cling but little did I know what I was in for but  I’m certain that hug made his day. Don’t ask me how I know; But for me the feeling was not mutual because was taking from me instead of giving.

You see the thing about hugs is that both parties involved are giving something, you can’t really enjoy a hug if its one-sided. It’s an exchange of warmth, affection, feelings, body, and love. Now that’s the kind of HUG I had in mind when I woke up this morning.

Don’t get me wrong. Sometimes, a hug is just what you need, like in my case to calm your nerves or to get through the many challenges of life you are faced with. So the next time you are going to give someone a hug, remember that it is an exchange. Try to make it special, warm, comforting and unforgettable. Let the hugging begin!


……..With beaming smiles, loads of virtual full hugs, scents of mixed body fragrances and screaming deadlines!


Oluwatosin Baiyewu 1600hrs May 11, 2013